Update on Chastity!

LAST RADIATION TREATMENT

7 months ago I began a relationship with this thing called cancer. It wasn't a mutual relationship! In the beginning we had an understanding that I would "wear the pants" in this relationship and in the end I would have the upper hand. I would win. However, I would allow it to teach me some lessons along the way. Cancer taught me about strength and courage that I had inside but never knew was there. It taught me to look at life differently and appreciate the little things I may not have paid attention to before. The saying, "don't sweat the small stuff" takes on a whole new meaning. Cancer has shown me kindness and caring in people around me and even others around the world. God has used cancer to reveal Himself to me in a brighter light than ever before. My eyes have been opened to Faith and complete trust in God.

Today I enter the last day, in the last phase of my treatment plan. After today I will go every six months for check ups. I endured 8 rounds of chemo, a lumpectomy and now 30 days of radiation. Emotions ran high yesterday in Dr. P's office. I had a bottled up meltdown! I couldn't quite explain my feelings other than I feel like this cancer, this horrible disease, has been a part of my life. It has brought sadness, pain, sickness, happiness and blessings all at the same time. This message in a way is my, "Dear John" letter to cancer. I said in the end I would win....And I have. Nobody can say that this relationship will never rekindle. However, I beg and pray to God that it doesn't. I am putting all of my faith in Him. Knowing and understanding that all things happen for a reason. I told a friend yesterday that although it has been an uphill climb, I feel like if I have helped one person in any way, brought them closer to God, helped them through a hardship or whatever the case might be, then all my suffering was worth it. Although I have found peace on my saddest days, it has been to much of a battle for my family and I hope they never have to go through this again.

I recently heard a song that describes my feelings perfectly; Blessings by Laura Story. "We pray for blessings, we pray for peace, comfort for family, protection while we sleep. We pray for healing, prosperity. We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering. All the while you hear each spoken need. Yet you love us way to much to give us lesser things. What if your blessings come through raindrops? What if you're healing comes through tears? What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know your near? What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy? And what if the trials of this life, the rain. The storms, the hardest nights, are your mercies in disguise?"

This trial has definitely been a blessing in disguise. Thank you God for your mercy and faithfulness. I am finished.